By Doris L. Omdahl, LMHC, RPT-S
Licensed Mental Health Counselor
Registered Play Therapist
What is an allowance? An allowance is a certain amount of money that people receive, after performing a job. An allowance can also be received as part of a previous agreement that specifies the amount of the allowance, how often it is received, and the conditions for it to happen. Many parents give their children allowances in exchange of chores performed around the house; other parents give their children allowances so that they have money, when they need it.
Allowance attached to chores: Parents differ in their opinion about paying the child or not, for doing their chores. Some parents do not agree with the idea of paying a child to have responsibilities around the house, yet others view money as a way for the child to feel motivated to do his chores, and to feel rewarded for his job. If a parent agree to attach an allowance to the child’s chores, it is very important that the parent describes in detail (probably with the help of a chart) what are the chores to be performed, how they need to be performed, how often, and the expected results. The parent also needs to have a plan of what will happen if the chores are done half-way, or they are not all done. Will the allowance be reduced? Will it be eliminated? Can the child get it back if he performs the chores late? All these are items to think about before we start a chore/allowance program.
Allowance schedule not attached to chores. Some parents view allowance as a way for the child to save money for what he wants, or what he needs, without having to constantly ask the parents. In this case, allowance can help the child learn financial responsibility, independence, and budgeting.
How much should the allowance be? Whether the allowance is given as payment of the chores or not attached to chores, the amount should be appropriate for the age of the child. Too much money will not teach them budgeting, and too little money will be discouraging, and will defeat its purpose.
How often should the allowance be given? Some parents like to disburse the allowance at the end of the week, when all the weekly chores have been performed, other parents might choose to give the child the allowance on a monthly basis.
Should there be rules about how to spend the allowance? Some parents specify how the allowance should be spent: (new shoes, new clothes, birthday presents for family members and friends) and other parents feel that the child should have the freedom to spend the allowance any way they want. (video games). It is important that the parent have some kind of saying or supervision about how the child spends the money, especially as they grow older. It would also be important to teach the child how to set some money aside, maybe in a bank account, so that they can start learning about savings.
Recommendations on using an allowance
- It is a good idea to start using an allowance with an elementary school age child.
- If you choose to give your child an allowance in exchange of chores performed around the house, instructions and directions need to be very specific. Tell your child exactly what you expect and by when you expect it.
- The amount of the allowance should be appropriate for the age of the child, as well as for the amount of chores expected. If the allowance is too small, the child will not be motivated to earn it
- Do not give the child a bigger allowance than deserved. This might reduce his motivation to continue to perform his chores in a consistent basis.
- Be consistent with your rules. Once the chores are performed to your expectations, the allowance should be disbursed as previously agreed upon. The allowance should not be paid without taking into consideration the quality of the job performed.
- As the child grows older, the program or approach needs to be modified; be flexible. Expectations and responsibilities change with age.